Shriek
by The Anime Avengers
Summary: Heh, a gundam meets shrek yaoi vampyre fic. Kinda funny, and co-written of course by tarnishedoversoul and GS
1. Chapter 1

Shriek  
  
Author's Note: Hello my sweets. Ah yes, and thus begins a new fic by the Anime Avengers. Does the sweet essence not tingle in your nose? Can you not anticipate the twists and turns?  
  
Okay, here's the buzz (and I don't mean just mean the buzz I'm getting off my cold meds.) I wanted to write a Gundam vampire fic, but I didn't know what to base the content on. So in my sickness I was sitting, and as a sat I watched, TV in fact. And I sat and I watched, and I watched and I sat. ALAS! An idea struck me! Why not do a parody on Shrek? In fact, a vampire parody called Shriek! (Come on, that princess almost looks like Duo.) And how original is this idea? I bet that no one out in Fan Fiction world has done this yet!  
  
I think that GS is going to co-write this with me, so keep those fingers crossed. Also, I'm happy to announce that my daddy just purchased a brand new shining Intel with internet access! This means any comments, suggestions and/or rants will reach us (me in particular). Any comment you have on this we are more than willing to hear. Now, I don't mind a bit of constructive criticism, but if you happen to be one of those people who randomly picks stories and flames them, beware. GS may be polite, but I'm not. –Luv ya! Tarnished Oversoul  
  
Warnings: Anyone who does not like yaoi, scoot! This fic is not for you. Though I don't foresee any graphic details (this is a PG 13 fic,) I would like to mention that the couplings of this fic are 01+04 and 02+05.  
  
Part One: First, Our Heero  
  
Once, in a place where no one was on time, there was a kingdom. In the kingdom lived a beautiful Prince named Quatre who ruled over the prosperous lands under the supervision of his father. Unfortunately, a curse of a dreadful sort was laid on the Prince Quatre. On his sixteenth birthday, His people imprisoned him in tallest tower of his castle with a dragon to guard him-  
  
"Hmph." The leather bound book was thrown into the woodstove to feed the dying fire. The young vampyre held the shard of painted glass to try and catch anything of his reflection. When he realized that the attempt was not going to give him more than a faint outline of dark hair and a fair face no matter what angle it was held at, he stopped and calmly threw the mirror too into the stove. The vampyre had a habit of throwing away or destroying things and people that did not agree with him or his system of thinking. Everything in his life had an order and a place and a time, and there was no place for social interaction of any kind.  
  
Except maybe dinner.  
  
"Kill the vampyre!"  
  
"Right on time." he noted with a steely voice. Even dinner came at the same time everyday. it was as if the villagers of Cinq just didn't realize that the mob they set out every third day at dusk didn't come back. Sooner or later the village would be completely devoid of men if they didn't wisen up. Maybe they'd even send women. The vampyre had always thought that women had always had much sweeter blood than men anyways.  
  
The Cinq vampyre stepped out of his crude hut with an indifferent look.  
  
"Back! Back you villain!" shouted a braver villager with a torch. The vampyre didn't move, and the brawny man began to wave his garlic chain in front of him.  
  
"Oh good, you brought your own seasonings."   
  
*** (Some time later)  
  
"He wasn't bad if I don't say so myself." the vampire said in a smoothly metallic voice. He licked his lips sensually, savouring the delicate flavour that they held. "Yes, there is a reason why the O blood type is so rare to find in humans."  
  
Now that the vampyre had fed, there were no duties left for the night and the rising of the sun was still so far off. So he donned a dark coloured cloak and disappeared into the night.  
  
*****  
A/N: Short, ne? Sorry, but the way my parts are working occasionally you're going to get these. I just wanted to get my next introduction and that just doesn't fit with this chapter. 


	2. Chapter 2

Shriek  
  
Author's note: Hey, I know I said I was going to see if GS was going to help me with this, but I feel it's only fair to let her have a bit more of an introduction to work with. (Plus I don't have any diskettes to use at the moment.)  
  
Just in case anyone was wondering, as far as I know homosexuality does seem to be to be a common occurrence in vampyres, (come on, has anyone read Anne Rice). Please excuse my archaic spellings of deamon (deamon) and vampyre (vampire), I just like the feel of the words better.  
  
Disclaimer: Hey, I don't own either Shrek or Gundam Wing so don't sue.  
  
Warning: I already gave you one warning, yaoi hintings. That's all I'm going to say.  
  
Part 2: Witches Wanted  
  
"Next!" was the shout of the heavily armoured officer. The braided boy threw a resentful glance over his left shoulder to his captor who bumped him forward in the line. When he decided that contorting his face would get him nowhere with this stupid cow of a man, he averted his violet eyes to his too tight bonds which he began to finger in desperation.  
  
"Next!" Again that annoying voice, the man thought to himself, screwing up his face to show his apparent distaste for the man and his voice. The Neanderthal shoved him again, and he resisted the temptation to flail both arms and hit the idiot. The guard gave the boy before him a look of equal contempt before settling his eyes on the boy's captor.  
  
"This a boy?" He said his sentence slowly, as if to make sure to penetrate the farmer's shallow knowledge.  
  
"Ya damn right 'e's a boy." The man's words were punctuated by his chewing on a piece of spit-saturated straw.  
  
"I confess I've never seen a male witch before, and this one looks far too pretty to be a boy. Are you sure this is a boy?"  
  
"Yessir, this 'un's a boy." The guard shifted one of the heavy metal plates adorning his body, not sure what to think. "Dis 'ere is Duo Maxwell, an' I'm real shur he's a boy. I was dere 'en his mama 'ad him."  
  
"I see, the witch'll be worth ten shillings if you can prove it. In fact, I'll make sure to take special care of this one." The look the guard gave the boy was that of one surveying a piece of steak before them before devouring it.  
  
"Fuck you, I'm nobody's sex toy." Maxwell whispered a few words and the ropes around his hands disappeared. Another short incantation was all that was needed to loose the ball and chain from round his foot, and for a few moments the crowd of military men before him even paused what they were doing to stare at the long hair in a sort of awe. Maxwell raised his delicate hand to his mouth and blew on his nails before proceeding to buff them on his meagre, threadbare black shirt.   
  
"Yes, I am the great and awesomely powerful Duo Maxwell! Fear my wrath, or burn in the fiery infernos of hell as the others who doubted before you!" The boy stood a moment with his hands straight up in the air, waiting for the group of witches, their captors and soldiers alike to bow down in acceptance of his commands.  
  
"Get him!" This was all the prompting needed to set the whole of the Romefellar army onto the sorely misled boy with all their spears, swords and daggers. A few growled and issued battle calls before turning on him, but when they had finished the whole of the military units (discluding the gold issuer who called out over the confusion, "NEXT!") turned on him   
  
Maxwell took this as his cue to run.  
  
Unfortunately for Maxwell, too much riding of broomsticks does nothing to harden the legs for running. While the brunette panted and puffed, the army advanced on him rapidly. Maxwell thought only of what would happen to him if he were caught as he ran feverishly, and that alone kept his not barely in shape body moving. He would have thought to use a handy time freezing spell, but that type of spell was especially difficult and required a long incantation that Maxwell just didn't have the breath to recite. So when the when the military troops caught up with the boy he only issued a long, silent curse as he leant onto a tree.  
  
"Witch, you and your companion are under the custody of the Romefellar army." The head of the guard smiled slyly, thinking of what he could do with the two beautiful captives in front of him. The one with the long hair and beautiful violet eyes appeared to have some minimal powers, but those could be kept in check with crafted crystal bindings. And there was the dominant looking one, who though shorter than the lankier frame of the violet eyed boy seemed to command a dominance in his shockingly cold cobalt eyes. There were so many possibilities: watch the two screw each other, do one of them, do both of them…and the list went on.  
  
"Companion?" Duo tightened his grip on the surprisingly smooth branch of the tree after the prolonged pause of catching his breath. He really needed to lay off the cream puffs, he noted with an inward smile. Wait a minute! His fingers gently trailed delicately down smooth skin to meet a brother hand, not the rough bark of a tree. He turned around and gasped at the figure before him. He had flawless white skin, a white that rivalled even the purest forms of ivory he sometimes used in potions, an undead white that was more untainted than even the simple white shirt beneath his black coat. His dark hair rippled in the wind, his intensely blue eyes seemed to swallow Duo, and at the same time his aura repelled all contact. The tight, black leather of his pants against his skin accented the muscles of his well built and trained physique. A simple black rose, the bloom of the damned, stuck its head ironically out of his coat pocket, and Maxwell knew at once that this boy whose hand he clasped was a vampyre.  
  
A vampyre, his sworn enemy to destroy, and yet he didn't seem to care.  
  
Maybe this vampyre would just suck become so drunk off the blood of the soldiers before them that he would forget that Duo Maxwell was a witch and spare him. Besides, he didn't look scary so much as a kid who'd just sucked a sour lemon, or something. Maxwell couldn't justify his feelings, but he just seemed to have an uncanny like for the guy. Duo draped an arm around the vampyre's shoulders while the people around him watched in astonishment, but none were more astonished than the vampyre himself. "Oh, you mean my friend Dracula over here?"  
  
"You, back you fiends!" cried a guard in a panic. Seeing no such thing was about to happen, he took off at a run. A few soldiers waved crosses as the head in command tried to control his troops.   
  
"Both of you are under arrest by the Romefellar Foundation!" He insisted finally, the big brute of the man. In a final attempt for dignity, he crossed his arms over his chest in what he figured an authoritative pose.  
  
"You and whose army?" whispered the vampyre coyly with a tiny smirk.  
  
"Why, this army!" The soldier proclaimed valiantly with an overdramatic sweep of his arm. He then stilled, as if waiting for his army to charge the pair. "I SAID, why this army!"  
  
"Buddy, you might not want to hear this but that army just went on a little holiday." Maxwell's smile grew as he watched the confused captain turn around in disgusted disbelief. When the man realized that the witch was true in what he said, his cocky face paled to a considerably lighter shade.  
  
"Ah, yes, well…" The man shifted in his heavy army, contemplating the odds of running away. But if there was any chance for him to do this, it must be at a moment the two hellful beasts least expected. He must first put the deamons at ease, and then suddenly run off like a startled animal. "Yes, I believe I may have been in the err on that one. Yes, that was my bad. I was very, very wrong, and I stand before you a man ready to apologize. No, you don't like apologies, maybe I could-"  
  
The vampyre reached out one of his lustrous hands and grabbed the man's jaw tightly in a liquid movement that was instantaneous to the eyes of both Maxwell and the captain. Dull, semi-intelligent eyes bulged slightly out of the harsh skull, but the vampyre still continued to squeeze and grate the face until it gave a pathetic squeal similar to that of a pig before it's slaughtering.  
  
"Shut up," he suggested with another squeeze. "You talk too much." And while the pathetic excuse for a human whimpered again, the vampyre touched his lips to his neck in a tease. The soldier wasn't particularly handsome, nor was he so smart as to cause Heero enjoyment in this game of cat and mouse, but the sheer rush he got from playing mind games with the human, first instilling sheer physical torture followed quickly with physical pleasure was delightfully deceitful. So now he held the dark haired captain in his embrace, and began to suckle gently at his neck.  
  
Duo stood back a distance from the scene playing out before his eyes, not quite sure what to think of the situation.  
  
When the human whimpered again to the vampyre, it was not from the same type of sheer excruciating pain as it had been moments ago. Heero withdrew himself for a moment to clearly see the lust-stricken face of his victim, to which he smiled devilishly. He ran his tongue first across his lips, and then across the soldier's who moaned in ecstasy. And when the human had his eyes closed his eyes and was calling out for more, the fair skinned monster violently tore at the nape of his neck with a perfectly pointed nail and began to drink from the slowly pouring blood.  
  
"Fuck." seethed the angry soldier, realizing his stupid mistake that would now cost him his life. The soldier pondered for a moment, and then brilliantly discovered his fate had been sealed when he stood idle while his army ran away. He cursed once more at the vampyre when Heero bit deeper into the flesh to allow the crimson spill to flow faster. He cursed until his blood flowed out from his throat, and still he continued to swear.  
  
"Stop that, you're wasting." The vampyre stopped for a swift moment to relay his message, but only a swift one as not to let the life force of the human slip away while he talked. He'd grown tired of the human's pathetic words, so with a rapid movement he sliced deeper into the body before him and sucked it to a husk. Then with a fluid movement, his arm dropped down and let the body fall carelessly to the carpeted forest ground. He then turned his sights to the witch.  
  
"Umm…?" Duo stood still, considering something coy to say. "That whole blood sucking thing, you think that up yourself?"  
  
The vampyre stared coldly at the taller witch with his burning eyes while the teen continued to chat. "Yeah, that was some really good work back there. You really scared them off good! Thanks man, I owe you one."  
  
"Aren't you scared of me?" the beautiful vampyre asked. "Aren't you afraid that I'm going to do to you what I did to him?"  
  
"Should I be?"  
  
The vampyre was shocked by this response and blinked slowly. "When people look at me I seem to instil the impression of fear. Why not in you?"  
  
Maxwell fondly wrapped an arm around the vampyre. "Well, I have no where to go and no future anyways. What the hell? Why not befriend a vampyre? So I thought to myself, this one saved my life anyways, he can't be that bad. Isn't it funny how fate works?"  
  
"You talk a lot," The vampyre cocked his head. "What's your name witch?"  
  
"My name's Duo Maxwell, you can call me Duo. Who are you?"  
  
"Umm," the vampyre cocked his head at the boy as if unsure of his name. "Heero Yuy."  
  
Together the two walked through the lush forest for a while, Maxwell humming as he walked.  
  
"Hey Heero?" the witch finally asked. "How do you stay in the sun without shrivelling up?"  
  
"Really good sunscreen," 


End file.
